WEEK 7 MATCHUPS

So... I’ve been away...

I'm a new dad now and my focus has been everywhere. But now I’m back with a vengeance, so let's get it started!

I have been holding out on these predicts as I was waiting on some possible trades to go through, but since everyone seems content to mention who they want to trade, then disappear for 3 days, I am FORCED to continue without them. Also, one change in the way I was doing these, I will try to cover transactions, but roster changes are too difficult to follow.

So without any more delay...

Braylon Edwards Scissor Hands vs. Snoho Slowmoes
Facebook Proj: 88 - 131.40

This match up pits QB's Donovan McNabb against Slowmoes Jay Cutler. I have little faith in McNabb this week as I don't know which one will show up, the one from 2 weeks ago who threw for 264 yards and 3 TD's or the McNabb from last week threw for only 269 yards and 0 TD's against Oakland. Those 2 teams have a passing defense ranked at 16 and 20 respectively and this week the Eagles are against a Washington pass defense that is ranked 6th in the league. On the other side, you have Cutler, who is having a great season, going up against Cincinnati who is ranked 29th against the pass. Scissor Hands is screwed here

The saving grace in this match up? Scissor Hands has Jonny Knox who has been Cutlers favorite target. It makes me question why Facebook projects him (along with Braylan Edwards) at 0.00? He is ranked in the top 20 for total points earned this season for Facebook, and that is with already having a bye week. After 6 games of the season, minus his bye week, he is averaging 15.6 points.

I feel the RB, TE and K and DEF positions all even out, but the WR spot, like every other week, is really a wildcard in this match up. I really like Slowmoes Steve Smith, but not this week. Carolina will be looking to run all over BUF #32 ranked run defense after throwing up 267 rushing yards against the #31 rush defense in Tampa Bay last week. Steve Smith only had 1 reception for 4 yards in that game.

That said, it is hard to pick against those receivers on his lineup, so I agree with Facebook that Slowmoe gets the win, but I doubt it will be by the 42.6 point spread they predict.

Moldy Cheeseheads vs. JimmyZ's Destroyers
Facebook Proj: 131.82 - 144.38

Last week, Tom Brady was a B-E-A-S-T!!! He scored 59.70 points and a HUGE FIRST victory for Moldy. Not to belittle the 47.06 that Brees threw up, but expect Brady to continue his streak this week with a weakened run game and the loss of I think 18 different RB's in the last 6 weeks.

I really like Moldy's tandem of RB's in Michael Turner and Ryan Grant who has a great running match up in Cleveland. The Cardinals running game is pathetic and Facebooks projected rating of almost 19 for Hightower is preposterous. JimmyZ's saving grace is Cedric Benson. I expect him to be the standout RB this week in the match up.

Both teams have a strong 2 out of 3 in their WR lineup. Donald Driver will have a strong showing against Cleveland and Breaston will be a strong performer for Arizona with Boldin out (or playing injured). But matched up against JimmyZ's Steve Smith of NY and Randy Moss, I think the WR battle will go to Jimmy.

I disagree with Facebook in this match up. JimmyZ's WR's won't be able to make up entirely for what he is lacking in the match ups at RB and QB. I know I say it every week, but Moldy... I expect you to win for a second week in a row. Good Luck!

Bozo's vs. Bacon Bits
Facebook Proj: 103.5 - 118.48

Any other week I'd say Matt Ryan has a chance to compete, but this week, his opponent is playing against a Cleveland Defense that just lost its top tackler and captain D'Qwell Jackson. That and the fact that the Browns have close to 10 players out with the swine flu and players are coming up to play from the practice squad. So Aaron Rogers throwing to Greg Jennings and Bacon Bits having both on his roster spells large numbers for Bozo's opponent.

So what does Bozo have to keep him in the game? Well... Adrian Peterson. He can make up as many points as most any 2 players. I feel his 2nd RB might hold him back though. I know Bozo is a Cardinals fan and sticking with Bennie Wells on the tied for last place rushing offense is the type of move only a fan would do. Arizona is only averaging 57 rushing yards per game. In my opinion, if you have a backup, I’d put him in.

Bozo has a decent WR lineup, but compared to Bacon's trio, all of which I consider to be VERY strong (Vincent Jackson, Greg Jennings and Hakeem Nicks), I don't thing Bozo has a chance this week. The TE match ups are equal with Jason Whitten facing off against Brent Celek. I'll give Bozo an 8 point spread in the Defense given that his SD Def are playing KC and Bacon's Giants are taking on the Cards. Facebook gives Bacon an advantage there 5-6, but I expect it to go way the other direction.

That said, I agree with Facebook who has it called for Bacon, but I think the spread they've given to Bacon of +15 is under projected. I am figuring closer to a +25. Sorry Bozo...

Yeshuwah vs. Team Burnt Toast
Facebook Proj: 139.64 - 114.96

Team Burnt Toast is sitting at 2-3, but you can't blame the team. He played 4 players last week on their bye week making for an easy victory for Bozo. It looks like he might be back this week, but we will see. He has showed interest trading some players, but then disappeared again for the last few days. We will see what happens

This week, Yeshuwah has a 25 point advantage, but that seems a little high. But, Big Ben, who threw for over 400 yards last week against the Browns, is projected at 32 points this week. The Vikings pass defense is ranked 1 point lower than Cleveland’s at #26. Eli is throwing against the Cardinals #22 ranked pass defense. This match up could really go either way.

Toast had LT on the bench, who was out much of the week with an illness, but returned to practice on Friday. Expect him to play, and play very well against a horrible Kansas City. In my opinion Toast... pull the Cadillac and put in LT.

Toasts WR lineup might be the best in the league with Wes Welker, Reggie Wayne and Santonio Holmes. The first of those 2 are playing the 0-6 Bucs and the 0-6 Rams.

I think Facebook is WAYYYY off. Yeshuwah will be praying for ice come Monday to reduce the swelling from the ass whoopin' toast can lay down this weekend. Ouch!

Trambo Will Triumph vs. Heidis Head Hunters
Facebook Proj: 130.64 - 116.38

First off I have a message for Heidi: Change your Facebook password... quick. Bacon has had his eye on Fitz for weeks. Can he really be trusted?!?!

This is a match up of shoulder shrugs and I have no ideas. Matt Forte. Underperformed all season. Frank Gore. Will he run like he did at the beginning of the season? Fitzgerald. If Boldin is out, will he be extra covered and will Breaston be the fav target again? Trambo's Boldin... will he even play? And if he doesn't, his backup Jerricho Cotchery is out for the week. I might be trying to trade for a quick WR today if I was you.

Now, I really like Trambo's Ronnie Brown. He is ranked #5 this week in the ESPN fantasy rankings for week 7. The wildcat formation seems to only work for Miami, and it works very well for both them, and Brown. Brown has had 3 great weeks so for of 27, 29 and 30. I also like Trambo's TE Dallas Clark.

But, don't count Heidi out! This game will be decided Monday night as she has BOTH Kurt Warner and Larry Fitz! They have combined for more than 60 points each of the last 2 weeks.

This match up really comes down to whether Bolding plays or not. Trambo better keep his fingers crossed. Myself, I'm not hopeful. I think Facebook is backwards on the weeks projections. Flip 'em and I will agree. Heidi gets my vote!

CMECRUSHU vs. White Devil White Devil
Facebook Proj: 108.08 - 118.74

Well, I can't see how this prediction will matter as CRUSH is missing a TE, which I am sure he will put in before game time, and White Devil White Devil, AKA I don't remember last weeks name or the week before, is sure to change his whole lineup after watching ESPN Sunday morning, reading the papers sports page, calling 16 FOX Sports interns, reading 42 fantasy football blogs and the rest of my predictions above. The only thing I can predict is that before tomorrow, he will find out by pigeon courier that some star RB or WR will be out with the plague and that his backup is expected to get 100% of the carries/receptions. Lucky...

But, I can't not finish my predictions, so here it is, based on what I have...

Which is the more unbalance match up? Phillip Rivers throwing against sometimes bad and sometimes horrible Kansas City, or Peyton Manning throwing against the always bad, 0-6 Rams. Rivers has scored 37 fantasy points @ Baltimore in week 2 and 33 @ Pittsburg in week 4. Manning has had 2 fantasy point games over 45! This is not looking good for CRUSH even with his dominating QB.

CRUSH's D'Angelo Williams is the #1 ranked RB by ESPN for this weeks match ups against the #32 ranked run defense in BUF. But, White Devil's Maroney is way under ranked with his projection of 7.68. Since every other RB on that squad is injured, Maroney finally gets back to his starting role and I am expecting numbers close to his 06 and 07 years. I am expecting close to 100 yards and at least 1 TD. With LT shaking the flu and coming back to practice on Friday, White Devil has chosen wisely to sit the backup sproles and put in NY's Bradshaw. The Cards might have the leagues best run defense, but I don't think it will hold up this weekend against the Giants power running duo. Expect them combined to throw up 180 yards. Sorry Boze...

The top WR's on White Devil's are better than what CRUCH is bringing. Ocho-Cinco, while being a distraction (ref. Fridays fine of 10k for wearing a wrong color chin strap), has been putting up great numbers. Devil also has Brees' favorite target in Colston.

This match up wraps up on Monday night with CRUSH's star WR DeSean Jackson helping him come from behind to beat White Devil, but a last second field goal from kicker David Akers gets White Devil the win! White Devil over CRUSH by .6!!!

And that is it for Week 7! Man it feels good to be back. Enjoy and good luck everyone!

Big Boys Toys - Week 3: Fantasy Football Review

WEEK 3 MATCHUPS

So who will be playing Vic?!?! Anyone?!?!

With week 3 closing in, let's take a look at the standings. With 2 teams at 2-0, and 2 teams at 0-2, the middle of the pack has a HUGE spread, almost 100 points. CMECRUSHU and Bozo may be undefeated, but one loss will throw them at least 4 places down the list given the HUGE weeks Jimmy Z, Keep on Sprolin' and Snoho Slowmoes have had (all over 300 points so far).

Bacon, like the Titans, you are easily the best 0-2 team out there... and CMECRUSHU, like the Broncos, you have got to be the worst 2-0 team out there. I am confused by these standings right now. Maybe I will be eating my words later, but I predict both you will have a 1 in the other column this weekend!

Braylon Edwards Scissor Hands vs. CMECRUSHU
Facebook Proj: 115.58 - 114.92

Roster Changes
Team: Braylon Edwards Scissor Hands
OUT: Roy Williams (WR)
IN: Braylon Edwards

Team: CMECRUSHU
NO ROSTER CHANGES

For the worst roster move of the week, Scissor hands pulls Roy Williams and puts in Braylon Edwards. No doubt, this will be the reason for his loss this week when he find himself only 5 points ahead after Sunday night’s game, leaving CMECRUCHU's DeAngelo Williams to make it a big win after running all over Dallas on Monday night.

Scissors only saving grace is that Joshua Cribbs from CLE is projected at only .5 points, but has been averaging almost 14 points over 2 games. Underrated!!!

This one will be close, so don't expect a huge blowout.

JimmyZ's Destroyers vs. Bozo's

Facebook Proj: 132.98 - 103.96

Roster Changes
TEAM: JimmyZ's Destroyers
OUT: Cedric Benson (RB), Torry Holt (WR)
IN: Knowshon Moreno (RB), Steve Smith (WR)

TEAM: Bozo's
OUT: Matt Ryan (QB)
IN: Joe Flacco (QB)

Bozo had better hope and pray for snow in Buffalo this weekend as that will be his only chance against a beast of a QB in Brees! WEATHER ALERT... WEATHER ALERT... BUFFALO IS EXPECTING RAIN AND WIND ALL WEEKEND WITH HIGHS IN THE MID 60'S! This might help. Keep the praying going!

Bozo has a strong offense this week with Flacco throwing against Cleveland, Adrian Peterson running all over San Fran and Jason Whitton catching all around a defeated team in Carolina. Can they hope to match Brees, Knowshon Moreno plowing down the Redskins or Randy Moss out with a vengeance from the embarrassing showing from last week? In my opinion... yes.

Bozo squeaks out another victory here for the biggest upset of the week! I think Bozo will have 150+ for the week.

Keep On Sprolin' vs. Team Burnt Toast
Facebook Proj: 94.46 - 116.82

Roster Changes
TEAM: Keep On Sprolin' (Formerly You Ochocincod My Battleship (Formerly Legion of Douchebaggery))
OUT: Carnell Williams (RB), T.J. Houshmandzadeh (WR), Indianapolis Colts (DEF)
IN: Felix Jones (RB), Chad Ochocinco (WR), Chicago Bears (DEF)

TEAM: Team Burnt Toast
OUT: LaDainian Tomlinson (RB), Laveranues Coles (WR), Visanthe Shiancoe (TE)
IN: Jonathan Stewart (RB), Santonio Holmes (WR), Dustin Keller (TE)

This week matches up 2 teams with the most moves in the last week, and with that, some BIG names will be sitting this week. LT, OUT! Cadillac, OUT! Whosyourmama, OUT! And the Indy Defense... OUT!!! Should be a great week to see some new talent score some points for these guys.

Facebook scores this one a blowout, but their facts aren't straight... again... and in Sprolin's favor. Darrin Sproles, again, has a projection of... 8?!?! Well I am expecting him to throw up similar numbers to last week’s showing of 26. I am unsure why Sprolin' would pull out Carnell Williams who provided over 20 points last week for Felix Jones who is projected at only 5.9, but as I have learned, he has tricks up his sleeves. Keep on Sprolin' Nostradamus!!!

I think Sprolin will pull off a win this week as Facebook seems to be smoking weed with its predictions here. Remember to puff, puff, pass FB!!!

Moldy Cheeseheads vs. Yeshuwah
Facebook Proj: 115.62 - 122.08

Roster Changes
TEAM: Moldy Cheeseheads
OUT: Isaac Bruce (WR)
IN: Earl Bennett (WR)

TEAM: Yeshuwah
NO ROSTER CHANGES

Both of these teams have had a rough couple weeks, but expect to see Moldy Cheeseheads step it up this week. These QB's, Yes's Big Ben and Moldy's Brady, will throw up some big numbers this week, but it is there I feel the similarities will end.

Moldy's RB's will have a great week, not only because Turner is a beast, but because they are going up against Yes's lineup of Portis, who will do well, and Jamal Lewis, who... shhhhhh... is out this week. His current status is doubtful. This is a game changer guys.

All of Moldy's WR have easy games against weak secondaries in CLE, STL and SEA, so big numbers are coming!

I expect Moldy to get a HUGE first win this weekend. This will be confidence building!

Heidi’s Head Hunters vs. Bacon Bits
Facebook Proj: 109.20 - 116.18

TEAM: Heidi’s Head Hunters
NO ROSTER CHANGES

TEAM: Bacon Bits
OUT: Eddie Royal (WR), Greg Olsen (TE)
IN: Devery Henderson (WR), Brent Celek (TE)

Bacon made some great moves this week putting in both Devery Henderson and Brent Celek. I think I am seeing this 2 game losing streak come to an end.

Heidi's Kurt Warner will have another 3 great quarters, only to have Leinart come in and ruin a HUGE lead quickly... again. You would have MONSTROUS numbers if Kurt could only finish a game, but being 132 years old in the NFL can be rough. The only person older than Warner still performing in their field at high level is Sean Connery, who by the way is amazing for 784 years old. You can suck it Trebek!

Frank Gore had a ridiculous week against Seattle last week, but the seagulls run defense is nothing compared to what MIN is. Expect to see him taking notes from the sideline as he watches Peterson run for 2 breakaways like Gore had last week.

Bacons matchups this week include 4 players against STL, and 1 against DEN, JAC and KC. Unfortunately, Heidi's matchups are against actual NFL teams this week’s compared to Bacon's Pop Warner opponents.

Bacon will be crying like a 19 lb baby when he pulls ahead of Heidi early and finds himself teary eyed when he looks to Heidi for a little sexy time and she is pissed about losing. I am calling for a holdout Heidi!!!

Snoho Slowmoes vs. Trambo Will Triumph
Facebook Proj: 123.40 - 117.12

Roster Changes
TEAM: Snoho Slowmoes
NO ROSTER CHANGES

TEAM: Trambo Will Triumph
NO ROSTER CHANGES

Snoho will roll over Trambo this week faster than Big Ben and Kellen Winslow's Bike Club at a wheelie competition. Snoho's receiving core is absolutely brutal. After a weak week 1 showing, all of them stepped it up HUGE week 2 to give him a combined total of over 75 from them alone. I expect the Slowmoes to be anything but this week. Expect to see a repeat of last week by scoring somewhere in the vicinity of 180 points this week.

But wait... If anyone can keep up, it would be Matt Schaub, Boldin, Cotchery and Clark. Trambo's lineup is nothing to laugh at, as You Ochocincod My Battleship learned last week. Trambo threw up over 165 points in last week’s 1 point victory.

This is my match of the week. Schaub threw for 357 yards and 4 TD's last week against the Titans last week. The Jag's are more ants compared to them, so image what Shaub will do to their secondary! Also, Gore ran for 2 HUGE TD's against Seattle last week, and now in comes Matt Forte for the Bears. I expect big numbers.

I'm on the same page as Facebook with this game in that Snoho will get the win, but it will be a great matchup!

Good luck everyone and enjoy your weekend!

Big Boys Toys - Week 2: Fantasy Football Review

WEEK 2 MATCHUPS

Braylon Edwards Scissor Hands vs. Bacon Bits

Facebook Proj: 116.30 - 112.56

Roster Changes

Team: Braylon Edwards Scissor Hands (formerly Cleveland Steamers)

OUT: Donovan McNabb (QB), Braylon Edwards (WR)

IN: Mark Sanchez (QB), Joshua Cribbs (WR)

Team: Bacon Bits

NO ROSTER CHANGES

When Bacon's Greenbay players Aaron Rogers, Greg Jennings and kicker Mason Crosby play in Cinni this week, Fantasy Football points will roll!!! In fact, with the exception of Houston RB Steve Slayton having to break through TENN defense, most of Bacon's players this week play against weaker defenses.

Braylon Edwards Scissor Hands is screwed... but wait! I think I see a light at the end of this tunnel!

After losing QB Donovan McNabb, Scissor Hands picked up the rookie QB sensation (says me), Mark Sanchez. Will he do as well as McNabb... no. Will he score big on New England... maybe? But I have a HUGE scoop. The New England Defense, being huge fans of Dirty Dancing, skipped most of practice this week mourning the loss of Patrick Swayze, and failed to watch any game footage of Sanchez from last week.

OK, now back to the light at the end of the tunnel. Positive note #1. Jones-Drew at Arizona. I like this a LOT. Positive note #2. Minnesota defense at Detroit. Expect big numbers from both of these.

That said, I do have to agree with Fasebook's projections here and give a sullen nod to Bacon Bits. Good luck buddy [I'm not your buddy, friend... I'm not your friend, guy... I'm not your guy, buddy]!

You Ochocincod My Battleship vs. Trambo Will Triumph

Facebook Proj: 96.56 - 114.50

Roster Changes

TEAM: You Ochocincod My Battleship (Formerly Legion of Douchebaggery)

OUT: Thomas Jones (RB), Zach Miller (TE)

IN: Carnell Williams (RB), Chris Cooley (TE)

TEAM: Trambo Will Triumph

OUT: Jay Cutler (QB), Matt Forte (RB), Ronnie Brown (RB)

IN: Matt Schaub (QB), Larry Johnson (RB), Marion Barber (RB)

The #3 rank vs. #12 ranks. Based on last week’s performance, this is a bloody battle. However, Trambo replaced his heavy hitters in Jay Cutler, Matt Forte and Ronnie Browns for Houston's QB Matt Schaub against TENN, Larry Johnson and Marion Barber against a tough run defense in the Giants. To be fair though, his starters, now benched, do have a very tough schedule as well.

Ochocincod made some big moves this week as well. Thomas Jones out, which I like since they are playing New England, and in place he brought in Carnell "Cadillac" Williams from Tampa Bay who is playing Buffalo. Now Facebook has his projection at 0.00, which makes no sense as he ran for 97 yards last week with 1 TD raking in 18 fantasy points against Dallas! I think this is such a good pickup that it surprised me when he happened to grab him just 30 minutes before I was to get him. Damn Facebook and its weird waiver times. I tried all weekend to pick him up for Week 2! Oh-well...

Now pitting offense against offense, I really like Peyton Manning against MIA over Matt Schaub throwing against TENN, and with LT out most likely this week, Sproles will tear past his Facebook projection of 7.10 and Cadillac will be closer to his Week 1 points of 18 than his projection of 0 to sprint past Trambo's rushing lineup for this week.

All else being fairly equal in my opinion based on ability and opponent, this week’s results will rely mostly on the QB's and RB.

I was going to agree with Facebook on this one, but just as I started typing, Kanye West came out of nowhere, ripping my keyboard out of my hands to say... "My boy Ochocincod will have the BEST week of all time. He will win by over 30 points. Here FB, you can finish now!!!" and threw the keyboard down while walking away. I think I will have to agree with him.

Bozo's vs. Moldy Cheeseheads

Facebook Proj: 107.58 - 102.74

Roster Changes

TEAM: Bozo's

NO ROSTER CHANGES

TEAM: Moldy Cheeseheads

OUT: Anthony Gonzalez (WR), Donald Lee (TE)

IN: Mark Clayton (WR), Benjamin Watson (TE)

Bozo blew past his Week 1 Facebook Projection by almost 50 points finishing in a very strong 2nd place overall with just over 160 points. Liking his odds, he is keeping his team unchanged for Week 2 and has decided not to bench his only weak spot from Week 1, Bennie Wells. But, as I feel he has a weak bench for RB's, this isn't entirely a bad decision.

Cheeseheads, on the other hand, who finished 2nd from last, upgraded his WR and TE spots grabbing guys who, over his last week, improves those position by over 40 points based on last week’s actuals. Someone’s starting to look like a contender. But will it be enough to match Bozo's Adrian Peterson running against Detroit? Well maybe, since most of Bozo's other picks have tough matchups this week.

Cheeseheads has Tom Brady at the Jets, Michael Turner running against Carolina, Donald Driver catching against a weak Cincinnati secondary and the Titans looking to hold a weak showing Houston from last week.

After a very strong showing Week 1, I expect Bozo to have a much smaller week this week. Expect Cheeseheads to get a tough win this week having to make up the 60 points Peterson will likely throw down against the Lions.

I call Facebook a liar and make my pick Moldy Cheeseheads over Bozo!!! I expect to hear Bozo's cries late Sunday night as he realizes Whitten, your last hope for the week, will not hit the spread needed as the minutes of the Sunday night game come to an end.

JimmyZ's Destroyers vs. CMECRUSHU

Facebook Proj: 129.18 - 114.18

Roster Changes

TEAM: JimmyZ's Destroyers

OUT: Kevin Smith (RB)

IN: Knowshon Moreno (RB)

TEAM: CMECRUSHU

OUT: Michael Crabtree (WR)

IN: Percy Harvin (WR)

The DREADED JimmyZ had a DEVASTATING Week 1 dominating Bacon Bits by almost 100pts!!! I have never seen a score so high. Embrace it while you can, because the Philly defense isn't the Lions defense, and 6 TD's will not happen twice... nor will the 5 INT's your Defense had. The good, the bad and the ugly of it this week is that if your Philly defense does well, it's because Brees did poorly... and vice versa.

Expect both running backs, Moreno, new for this week, and Benson, to have smaller weeks as the defenses they face have better run defenses than the previous week’s opponents.

CMECRUSHU... well at least I can't pick on you about Crabtree this week. Welcome to the league man. I still cannot believe you won last week. Onward! Philip Rivers should continue to have a successful week this week, and I agree with Facebook that he will end up close to 30pts again. But you will need more than that to keep up with Brees, and I don't think you have it. Have the Vaseline close at hand as I think Week 2 will burn a bit without it.

Facebook has it right here and we agree JimmyZ will keep his league lead as he should finish Week 2 at 2-0.

Heidi’s Head Hunters vs. Team Burnt Toast

Facebook Proj: 110.32 - 110.42

Roster Changes

TEAM: Heidi’s Head Hunters

NO ROSTER CHANGES

TEAM: Team Burnt Toast

NO ROSTER CHANGES

Burnt Toast squeaked out a Monday night win on me last week and he could do it again this weekend as last week’s #1 receiver with 32 points, Reggie Wayne, doesn't play until Monday night. Heidi should be losing even more sleep than usual come Sunday night if she finds herself within 30 points of Toast.

Brian Westbrook will make the difference in this being a close game, or Heidi running away with it. Without McNabb, the Eagles best option is to run, run and run. But knowing that, the New Orleans should be prepared to stop the run, run and run. If Westbrook can break through, he might balance out the fact that LT will have little to no action this Sunday against Baltimore. But shhh... maybe Toast doesn't know this yet. I hope he is reading these predictions!

The big question for this week for both teams is the receiving core. Will Berrian for MIN actually be a target for Favre, and can Carson Palmer actually get a catchable ball out to his #2 receiver in Coles? Aside from the starting WR in Wayne and Fitz, this receiving core is waiting for a jump start.

Finally, it is said Defense wins Superbowls, and if that is the truth, this week’s pits Heidi's Baltimore defense against the Chargers and Toasts Cardinals against Jacksonville. Arizona sucks against the run, and Jones-Drew will take advantage against that. If the secondary can stop the air attack, it might keep this close. But... bring from Phoenix and knowing the Cards...

Heidi should win this week bringing her overall win/loss back to .500. Facebook favors Toast by .10 points, and I call for a reversal. Heidi over Toast!

Yeshuwah vs. Snoho Slowmoes

Facebook Proj: 112.42 - 127.40

Roster Changes

TEAM: Yeshuwah

OUT: Joseph Addai (RB)

IN: Jamal Lewis (RB)

TEAM: Snoho Slowmoes

OUT: Owen Daniels (TE)

IN: Jeremy Shockey (TE)

Slowmoes came out of the draft with some heavy bragging: "We should re-draft...I'm feeling really bad about how much I’m going to dominate after that draft."

After Week 1, all I can hear is crickets... Now, once you can take the cricket from my hand, you will have learned your lesson. For today, strong receivers at the mercy of weak quarterbacks make for big losses.

That said, this week should favor you much better as your failed offense of week 1 should, and I stress should, pick up this week. If you look at your receivers teams last week, all of them lost. And it is reflected in their stats and fantasy points. The focus this week will be to get the ball in their capable hands as they are the only offensive playmakers on these teams. I expect HUGE numbers from all 3 this week.

Another person I expect big numbers from is Big Ben himself. Expect him to bring in some big points for Yeshuwah creating a deficit for Slowmoes Romo to dig out of. I expect the RB tandem of Cleveland’s Lewis and the Redskins Portis to run all over Slowmoes lineup of Balt's Rice and TENN's Johnson, as he will be splitting a lot of carries with White.

This week can turn out to be very close, but I agree with Facebook experts to provide the Slowmoes with their first win.

Good luck everyone and enjoy your weekend!

Big Boys Toys - Week 1: Fantasy Football Review

IT'S FOOTBALL TIME!!!

I figured I would take a few minutes to review this weeks match ups to hopefully knock some sense into you guys... You know who i'm talking too *cough* starting Michael Crabtree?!?! *cough*

So to start it off, let's take a look at the most important game of the week...

Cleveland Steamers vs. Team Burnt Toast
Facebook Proj: 132.30 - 116.36

Ouch!!!

Matching up Steamers QB McNabb against Burnt's Eli, I feel both have the chance to put up some great number. In 2008, Eli threw for 216 and 305 yards in his 2 meetings with WAS for a combined 1 TD... ouch! The last meeting between PHI and CAR resulted in 3 TD passes. Hmm... 1 pt PHILLY!

As for the rest of the lineups, I feel the RB's match up well. I'd put Steamers Drew-Jones ahead of Burnt's LT most days but San Diego is playing, hmmmm... Oakland. SHIT!!! I like Toast's WR lineup a little more this week as Steamers T.O. seems to be having problems in BUF and Roy Williams is coming off an injury. My other huge differential builder is in the Defense catagory. Steamers has the Vikings who are playing against the Browns, wheras Toast has his Cardinals taking on San Fran.

I agree with Facebook on this one that Cleveland Steamers will take it, but I feel the diferential will be within 7 and not the 16 that they claim.


Legion of Douchebagery vs. Heidis Head Hunters
Facebook Proj: 107.67 - 116.82

Lets hope Kurt Warner leaves his walker on the sidelines for this game!

In all reality, this is a much closer match up on paper. With Boldin injured, Fitz and Breaston will be sharing most of the receiver options. Let's just hope Breaston can start catching them now as pre-season was a struggle for him. I give Douche's QB, Peyton, the nod for this week. I feel both RB's for both teams will perform well as they are all playing teams weak against the run. And both of you have a starter and secondary RB in this week behind strong starting RB's.

I feel the only weakness this week for you guys is the WR lineup. Besides Heidi's star WR Fitz, I feel she doesn't have a strong showing, but Berrian could really pick apart the Browns weak secondary on Sunday. I believe his performance will determine a W or L for the Head Hunters this week.

However I disagree with Facebook, and believe Douchebagery will squeeeeek out a win with a diferential of maybe 2-3.


Bacon Bits vs JimmyZ's Destroyers
Facebook Proj: 121.72 - 126.28

Given the choice of two QB's, Brees or Rogers, I would pick Brees EVERY TIME... especially when Rogers is playing against the Bears this week and Brees is playing against the Lions. I would be suprised if Brees doesn't turn out to be the BIG points winner this week. Sorry Bacon, but it's your QB who will be chewed to Bits this week

Looking into the rest of the offenses, Destroyers is kind of playing against himself. He has Moreno from DEN as his RB, which I love for this week... but he is also still starting Brandon Marshall, who is questionable for this weekend. And even if he does play, I wouldn't expect a lot of love on the field as he's been asking to leave! Good luck with him this week.

There is only one worse WR playing this week, and we will get to that team in another post. You better know who you are! On the other hand Bacon has Jennings from GB and who I think will get the real catches this week for DEN, Royal. I will have to give the WR nod to Bacon.

In my opinion, both of these defenses are equal this week, so... drum roll please...

I agree with Facebook here and select Destroyers to do just that to Bacon, but I think teh spread will be wider than the 5 they predict.


Snoho Slowmoes vs Bozo's
Facebook Proj: 121.44 - 111.94

I have some trouble... Bozo is both my boss and friend, so I would like to see someoe pound his ass into the ground, and at the same time, be gentle so I don't have to hear him whine come Monday...

That said, Bozo has a stong QB prospect in Matt Ryan. I like his odds better that Slowmoes faith in Romo. Romo is issing T.O. this season, and Roy Williams is coming off an injury and seems slow right now. You only hope is that Whitten is ready to take a bunch of catches and... wait... Bozo has Whitten?!?! Slowmoe, You are screwed!!!

Digging deeper into the offenses, Bozo made some shifts late this week to bolster his running game, but did he really need it? #1 draft pick Peterson starting game one against one of the WORST run defenses in the league, CLE. Once again Slowmoe, sorry...

Slowmoe's only saving grace, or should I say 3 saving graces, is his league best WR lineup. AMAZING!!! Steve Smith (the real one with CAR, not NY), Andre Johnson and Calvin johnson?!?! Did you get 3 amazing picks in a row or what?

I like both defenses a lot too, but feel Bozo with Chargers taking on the Raiders has a bit of an edge over Slowmoes PITT vs TENN.

Overall, I disagree with Facebook on this one, as I think Peterson, Whitton and Ryan will help keep thuis differential close, with a slight edge to Bozo. Bozo > Slowmoe by less than 5.


Trambo Will Triumph vs Yeshuwah
Facebook Proj: 121.76 - 116.12

Is Cutler a better QB than Big Ben... Yes, but, who is he going to throw to that is worth a dam???
Facebook rates them 29.36 and 28.42 respectively. I don't think either will score that well this week, but I do feel they are really ranked that closely based on Cutlers skill to WR depth and Ben's WR depth to skill.
In this head-to-head rumble, Trambo has the stronger running game, as Yeshuwah's stronger RB, Portis, is heads up against a strong run defense in the Giants. Thsi will cause you trouble this week and Trambo should pull ahead in the RB war... but wait...

Trambo is running a core of backups at the WR. Walter in Houston is #2 to Johnson, and Boldin, THE BEST #2 WR in the game, is out for the game. I like Sanchez with the Jets a lot, and his #1 receiver, Cotchery is your only hope. However, that is all you have this week at WR is hope. Sorry...

That said, I disagree with Facebook here and believe Yes will take this week with the biggest diferential of more than 10 points, a 15 point swing over their projection.


Moldy Cheeseheads vs CMECRUSHU
Facebook Proj: 111.70 - 106.66

This will be the blowout of the week!!!

Sorry to pick on you, but CMECRUCHU won't be crushing anything but a ton of beer cans as he drinks himself stupid watching his 3rd string WR from KC, Bowe, his #2 WR from PHI, Jackson, and... wait... is that Crabtree with SF as your #3 WR? You offensive is just that, offensive. You got screwed son. Crabtree hasn't even been signed yet, and might not at all. Time to bench that kid, and maybe even let him go quickly!

Moving on, I like Crush's QB in Rivers, especially, like I said previously, against the Raiders. I expect good numbers out of him this week. The running game for both of you should be pretty close as well, so look to the weak receiving core to be the big difference in this battle.

I agree with Facebook's projections, but expect it to be larger than the 7 point differential they project. I'm guessing around 14 points.

So that's i for this week!!! Good luck to you all and have fun!!!